Merging is a New Journey - Outside Looking In

Church Family before a Maundy Thursday service

So, for over a month, I have been participating in viewing the live stream services at Poughkeepsie UMC (PUMC).  It has been great seeing the familiar usernames each week chatting, offering peace, and just being present for the service.

But it reminded me that I will be back in an uncomfortable place, once again, when we get through all this and we are able to meet as a physical church body.  The uncomfortable place?  Outside looking in.

I am quite introverted.  I have gotten out of my shell a bit, especially as I am involved in district and conference-wide events and meetings.  But, it still takes me awhile in unfamiliar places to open up and be myself and get to know people.

And soon (I hope) I will be in this uncomfortable place again.  Outside the familiarity of knowing most of the people that filled the pews I was so accustomed to and having to test my brain regularly, learning everyone's names and what they do.  (Because guess what?  I'm bad at names!)

I know it will do me good to be in this vulnerable place.  In this time when we are all separated from each other, I really do miss and know I will miss the familiarity of knowing pretty much everyone who walks through the doors and what is going on with them.  But I look forward to the day when I can start this uncomfortable process of starting over.  And I look forward to the day when my feeling of being outside looking in moves to the feeling of being inside once again.