Thursday Thoughts - Inspiration

Do you ever go back through old things to get inspiration for something new?

My Camera folder on my phone's SD card has over 9,000 images (and almost 400 videos).  So as I was seeking inspiration for this blog entry and a matching picture (because I get more views when I include a picture on the blog entry) I just kind of took my finger and sent my Camera folder flying by all the recent pictures into older pictures from like 5 years ago.

I found a TON of old church pictures that I wished I had thought to hunt down because they would have been great for the photo presentation.  (I've been considering updating it anyway so maybe I'll include some of the re-discovered photos.)  They brought back memories and potential inspiration for the continuing Merging is a New Journey series.

T-Shirt Design by Felicia Day

I also found that over the past several years, there are many things in common with my photos.  I like to take pictures of sunsets (and sunrises if I'm awake) and other pretty sky pictures.  And campus pictures!  I take a lot of "us-ies" with Anastasia.  As I said, I had a ton of church pictures.  I take lots of photos at things I attend, like concerts and NYCC.  I keep track of before/after photos of my hair when it would get cut.  I take photos of things that remind me of something else and inspirational phrases or sayings.  And more recently, I have been taking pictures of myself to share - which I never did before unless someone else was in the picture.

Any one of these photos could inspire a blog entry.  So it just makes me think of how blessed I am to have so much inspiration all around me that I can experience in the moment or reflect on later.

Merging is a New Journey - My (New) Ash Wednesday Tradition

Ash Wednesday marks the start of Lent.  I have had a variety of traditions, in a sense, on this day.  For awhile when I wasn't able to make church service, I would go to the chapel on campus at work and get my ashes and spend some time in prayer.  When I was able to get to church, well, I got my ashes there.  We had a few different services when we received ashes but that was always part of the tradition.  This year, we self-imposed due to COVID restrictions.  But even that is not what I am talking about.

My self-imposed ash cross 2/17/2021

Ash Wednesday 2020 was the first time I attended worship at PUMC as we got closer to our official merger.  We had been in the service a few years before on Ash Wednesday, but it was just because it was nearby and we didn't have a service at our church.  So, for me, this was my first real experience with my soon-to-be church family.

My sister and I sat near some of our church family from Wappingers and it was a very nice service.

When we received ashes, we could stay up at the prayer rail to receive prayer from Pastor Jody, which I did.  There was a lot going on for me.  This was all pre-COVID but I did need the prayers, badly.  After being at the rail, praying, and crying a lot I walked back to the pew where we were seated.  I didn't pay attention and when I walked into the pew, I SLAMMED my leg into the pew.  And when I say SLAMMED I mean SLAMMED with such force that I had a bruise on my right knee for a month.

Thus began the joke about the pews biting me.

So, I was usually quite careful until Epiphany when I got so excited about the music I slammed my leg again.

And then Ash Wednesday 2021 came.

No, we did not have in person service, but I assisted with the technology.

And slammed my left leg into the pew.

So, it is now my new Ash Wednesday Tradition, I guess.  Slamming my leg into a pew at church.

Funny, I guess?  Because at first I was like, "OW!" then "Oh no, again?" then laughing to myself.  Good thing I was wearing a mask because my facial expressions would have been hilarious to anyone else.

Thursday Thoughts - Appreciating Views Even When Cold

It seems I have found a new appreciation for the views that I have known for so long, even now when it is quite cold outside sometimes.

View from The Hancock Center 2/17/2021

Like this view from the main floor of the Hancock Center at Marist that I took yesterday during one of my trips there.  It is not a new view.  Maybe it looks a bit different because of the clouds, and any time there are clouds they are never the same twice.  But it is definitely a view I have gone by many times before once the building was about 10 years ago.  

But I think part of the reason is because last year I was away from campus for so long and when I was on campus, my goal was to take care of what I needed to and get back home, since being on campus was very restricted.  So I didn't really take the time to appreciate the views.

Campus has been so quiet during the extended winter break and it just seemed like the time to take in the views I could when I could.  I find myself on days when the sun has been shining driving down to the river to get pictures of the water and the sun setting.  Actually, most days I drive down there just saying to myself, "I'm just going to sit for a minute or two and look at the river." And then I wind up taking pictures because it just calls for me to savor the moment.

And yes, appreciating these views would be a lot easier if it wasn't so cold outside.  But then I wouldn't get the ice!  It is important to appreciate the views in all sorts of weather.  I am so blessed to be able to see these views because most others I know only get to experience them through my photos.

I am glad for this new appreciation for the views I have come to know so well.  And I hope as things get better, like warmer weather, more sun, less snow, and even being able to have more people on campus, that I continue to appreciate the views.

Merging is a New Journey - The First Sermon

That's right, you heard it here.  I have now given my first sermon at PUMC.

Giving my first sermon

As with many things, it was because I opened my mouth (or typed my fingers rather) and offered.  Which made me quite nervous leading up to Sunday's service.  Yes, I have given sermons before.  But this was in front of the church family that I am still getting to know in some ways and in a new place with a new format - my first to a webcam that broadcast online.

There was a lot of help from others, so I didn't have to do it all on my own.  Which was nice.  And strange.  But a great blessing.

I think I am still processing things.

There were a few reasons why I was so much more nervous than usual.

I spent time in prayer at home before I left for church.  I also did something I haven't done in a long time...

Anointing Oil

That would be anoint myself prior to leaving the house.  Well, usually I would anoint myself at church before everyone showed up.  But that was when I had the oil hidden in the sanctuary of Wappingers.  Now it is home with me, and it got some use yesterday!

I got to church and then got REALLY NERVOUS before I walked into the building.  I prayed again, walked in, and then felt calmer.

There is just something about that peace you feel, even though you may be nervous about something, but that peace that God brings when you need it most.

Did I speak without making mistakes?  Nope.

Did I skip over a line in what I was reading?  Yup.

Did I forget to include everything I needed in my bulletin script?  Yup, even after a second revision on Saturday.

Did a message from God get shared?  I certainly hope so.

And I think that is what matters most.

Also, for the first time, I really felt alive when I was preaching.  Not that I wasn't before.  But I think having such a long break from preaching really helped me gain a new focus and sense of sharing that I didn't have before.  I'm continuing to learn that breaks can be a good thing - because I become refreshed and revitalized!

Thursday Thoughts - Stress Eating

Everyone does it, right?  Stress eating.  Or in my case, stress buying that leads to stress eating.  Or drinking since one day I stress bought Hi-C Orange juice boxes.

But Sunday, during the snow, I stress bought a microwaveable cake.

Cake!

I really felt like cake with frosting.  Or even cupcakes with frosting.  But I went with this easy cake kit.  You just need the mix, an egg, and some oil.  Super simple to make.  And it tasted great!  The object for me with these things is to make them early enough so I can let them cool off before eating them.  When I have made those cake in a mug things, I always eat it right away and it is so warm and I just don't enjoy it.  However, making it early and then letting it sit and cool off like an actual cake or cupcakes did the trick.

This cake lasted 3 days - I had it for dessert on 2 days and as my sweet after lunch the 3rd day.  And it was still good.

So, why stress eating?

It has been something I have been very good about NOT doing.  For awhile actually.  Even when I was working from home, I stuck to my usual meal routine and did not find myself going to snack even though I was so close to the kitchen.  It probably also helped that Sparkle was always right by my side so if I wanted a snack, I'd have to deal with her.

But, lately I have found that when I am stressed about something at work or something going on personally, I'm buying and then consuming things I wouldn't normally consume.  Like the Orange Hi-C.  Or the cake.  Or trekking to Tops to get a slice of their marble cake with whipped cream frosting.

I don't suppose it is a terrible thing, as long as it is done in moderation and not like every day.  (Which doesn't happen.)

But it seemed appropriate that I share this splurge as I finish writing what seems to be making me a bit nervous.

Merging is a New Journey - A Year-Long Journey (Special Edition)

One year ago today, I started writing this blog series, Merging is a New Journey.  My entries started out on a not-so-regular basis with just a bunch of text.  Eventually I started adding pictures.  And then in mid-October I started writing more frequently, choosing Mondays as my regular posting day for this series.  It seems every time I should stop writing the series, I come up with something else to write about related to the journey of merging.

But today I just wanted to reflect on the fact that my writing has been going on for a year.  And I've compiled much of my writing into a single document that I hope will help others who might be currently in the same position as me, or will be that way someday, or was in that position some day.

I am on draft version 2 after spending time reviewing my first draft myself and making a number of edits.  (See below)

The start of my document editing process

There isn't a cover page yet - which I just realized.  But at least it has a title!  Merging is a New Journey - Thoughts from One Merged Member.  And it is a title that I didn't have a hard time coming up with!

For those who have been reading my blog entries from the start, thank you!

For those who are new to my blog, thank you!

For those who are reading the compiled document and providing feedback, thank you!

For those who maybe haven't read my entries, but have supported the entire process, thank you!

I did not really think I'd be writing this one for a year because it started out as a way to cope with all the hard stuff.  But I am enjoying learning and experiencing new things and having that be part of the journey as well.  I don't know when this series will end or slow down, but for now it is good to be able to share it with all of you!

Merging is a New Journey - Coming Up with a Title

When I was in college - from my undergraduate to my various masters-level programs, one of the very last things I did when writing a paper was to come up with the title.  Titles were always a struggle for me.  I didn't want to create a title and then feel like I was stuck living up to that title.  It was easier to write the paper first, then when I had everything written, I had a better sense of what the title should be.  What also helped was during the writing process I would also do research so a definite theme would arise which would then lend itself to a title.

Titles are crucial.  They give someone that kind of one-liner that will tell them all about something...whether it is a sermon, a paper, or even a book.  If a book had a boring-sounding title, would you pick it up to buy?  Or if it had a good title and you read it and the book had nothing to do with the title, would you buy more from the same author?  Or would you be frustrated?  When I would write papers, if the title didn't really go with the paper, some professors would make a note of that and I would be disappointed in myself.  But titles are a necessary struggle, at least for me.

Sermon Prep - Including Title Creation

Titles do not just make me slightly stressed when I write papers.  I also experience the same struggle when writing a sermon.  In fact, it is probably worse when writing a sermon because the title needs to be reflected somehow in the words I am saying and usually you have to submit your sermon title ahead of actually writing the sermon.  So - often I create a title and then stress to make sure that whatever I wind up talking about somehow gets back to that title. 

And writing my first sermon in a different place is no different.

In the span of 2 days I went through about 10 different ideas as I read through notes I had gathered and read through the scriptures.  FINALLY last night after a meeting I settled on an idea.  And wrote it down before I forgot it!

It is nice to know that even though some things have changed - there are some things that have not changed at all.  Though there is a new journey, part of that new journey is making the familiar part of it.  Sermon-prep, including coming up with a title, was something I have done a lot.  So I am glad to know that 1 1/2 years after preaching my last sermon to my own congregation...that I can still go through the process and prepare for the next stage in my journey.

Thursday Thoughts - Music for Clearing Snow

Lately (okay, since mid-October) I have been playing a particular playlist on my iPod when I drive my car.  Doesn't matter how far I am going, the playlist plays.  And usually I forget to unplug the iPod before I turn off the car.  I do it afterwards, but if I don't plug my iPod in my car is usually playing pretty loudly whatever the default is in my car.  If I have a CD in the car, it is the CD.  If I didn't have a CD in, it's my XM radio.

Well, I have had a CD in the car.

So, while warming up my car the other day to clear it off....I got a great mix of music that was playing kind of...loudly....as the snow disappeared from my car....

Loud music for snow clearing!

I highly recommend the following tracks for good snow clearing:

Also Sprach Zarathoustra (Strauss)
Dance of the Knights from Romeo & Juliet (Prokofiev)
Dies Irae from Requiem (Mozart)
1812 Overture (Tchaikovsky)

In other words, the first 4 tracks on my Disk Two.

They are all invigorating pieces of music that really help as you brush snow off your car.

Have a musical day!

Merging is a New Journey - Adapting to Different Worship

When the pandemic started, and everyone moved from in-person worship to varying forms of non-in-person worship (Facebook Live, YouTube, Zoom, conference calls, or a combination) people eventually figured out how best for their own space how to do things.  For those of us who were also working remotely, some of these same skills translated to our own jobs.

I always felt like I was behind the curve in this because while so many people had their own computer set ups for both work and worship, I sit in my room with a laptop sometimes struggling to do what I was able to do somewhere else.

But mostly, struggling to get my dog to cooperate with me.

FINALLY Calm Sparkle

My dog, Sparkle, apparently sleeps most of the day away while I am at work.  When I was working from home she mostly does the same thing, but since she was always next to me she figured she would get more attention to go out to play for awhile and then eventually settle back down again.

However, we have had quite the struggle on church days.

She likes to wake me at my usual work time, which is not always helpful because I can sleep in a bit on Sundays when I am not doing something in service.  And I take her out.

So all would seem good, right?  She goes out.  We come back to my room.  She settles down and sleeps.

That is until her impeccable timing of wanting attention and to go out just as the prelude starts.

Literally. Every. Time.

So, I have been working at trying to find ways to adapt to her...predictability.

After months of this, I finally got it down, as you could see.  At least for one week.

It required me taking her out exactly 15 minutes before service was supposed to start.  Then giving her a bunch of treats and a toy to lick and to stretch my leg out so she knew I was there with her.  And there she stayed until I had to get up to move my car in the middle of my State of the Church recording.

But, how many of us during this pandemic had to adjust and adapt to new ways of worshiping?  I suspect most of us.  Sure, some pastors were already sharing their sermons or services online before all this, but never because that was the only way their people would be able to experience church.

As a congregation merging with another congregation, we too had our own adapting that we had to do.  In this case, it happened mid-pandemic so we were all adapting, those already part of PUMC and those new to the congregation, all at the same time.  So that may have made things a little easier.  Though, to be fair, we had our way of worship changed numerous times over the past few years, we were kind of used to it.

But adapting to new ways of worshiping is a good thing.  It broadens our horizons and expands our knowledge of how we can worship God.  Maybe one church focuses more on scripture or another focuses more on liturgy and another focuses on music.  What matters most, though, is that God is in the center.

So, while I am still struggling at times to manage my excitable dog when I am trying to focus on worship, I just have to keep working to adapt for what fits us best while I sit at home to worship.