The Last Thought of 2022

Here we are on the last day of 2022.

I thought about a lot of things I could say. And various ways to say them.

It has been a year of stress. A year of change. A year of getting even closer with friends. A year of learning. A year of music. A year of having to take more on. A year of having to start making some decisions. A year of laughter. A year with many, many, many sunsets. And other interesting photos. A year of coffee and tea. A year of trying a lot of new foods. A year of growth with my church family. A year of crafting.

There were things I so wished for in 2022 that didn't happen. But some things that did happen. I found a new doctor and as a result of medications I have significantly less migraines.  I got to see and hear 2 more huge organs. I earned a certificate in Music Ministry. I got a new job after 23 1/2 years in one position. 

I cried a lot this year and I have a feeling that won't change in 2023. But I also smiled a lot. And laughed a lot.

While there are things I wish I had done or wish I had said or wish I had the courage to say or do in 2022, it was the year it was supposed to be.

And I'm hoping that 2023 is as interesting as 2022 was - and maybe more so. And I hope to get back in a more regular routine of blogging too - because I have missed it!

The view from my back yard 12/25/2022

Monday Musings - Trying to Find Joy

 

Joy - From 12/24/2020

Yesterday if you lit an Advent Wreath, you lit the pink candle, or the Joy candle. Going to two different services at church means I got to experience it twice.  Our pastor had us contemplate Joy, in both services, as well as sharing things that give you joy. And one of the things he said was that sometimes it is hard, especially at this time of year, for some people to find the joy.  But to try to find the joy in what others find joy in.

I will admit - this is where I struggle. And, appropriately enough (or inappropriately), I struggled a whole lot with this over the weekend.

Though the end of Saturday was a great day, the start to my Saturday was not good at all. And, it probably stemmed from some stuff that was going on in my head from Friday night. My dog woke me up early, and when I say early, I mean before 7am. On a day, in fact, the ONLY day I have to sleep past 7am. And then she refused to settle down, which meant I couldn't try to get more rest. And I also wound up having to take her out again before I went out to run the errands I had planned. Plus there was some other chaos going on that started to bring me down.

By the time I got home, which wasn't really that late, I still couldn't have a few moments of peace because I had more treks outside with the dog, had to make myself some lunch, grab a shower and fix my hair, and then go to a party hosted by my pastor and his family. Which was the part of my day that actually went well.

But before that I was struggling, a lot, with finding joy. 

I have tried to not be a negative person. Or to be able to find the good in any situation. But, there are times that I am human and I do struggle to find the joy.

There was a lot of joy going on around me, at home, at church, and other places. And there are things that definitely bring me joy on a personal level. I am working on trying to focus on those things. But sometimes my brain tries to bring me down.

So I keep trying to find the joy.

Heading into Christmas is a season of joy. And yes, I realize that there are people who are not able to find the joy for reasons very different from my own. But I keep trying to find it - if not for myself, then joy for others who need it or who are experiencing it.

That's why I chose to share the photo I did on this blog entry - from two years ago. Because that Christmas Eve day was one of joy. It was one of struggles too, as I fought with a migraine the entire day while attending multiple church services and singing at them. But it was also one of joy as it was our first Christmas Eve at our new church. 

So as I look back on that day, I think about the joy of that day despite my personal struggles that day and hope it helps me find the joy today. And I think about the music we sing at this time of year. One song in particular that keeps running through my head has the words to Joyful, Joyful in it but also has a chorus where it says "Joy, Unspeakable Joy..."  With that in my head, I try to find that unspeakable joy.

Monday Musings - My Photos

All I use is whatever camera is on my phone.  I've tried a few different camera apps from time to time in order to get better photos, but for the most part all the photos I take are from the actual camera on whatever phone I have.

And people compliment me on them all the time.

I'm not sure what I do that is different from anyone else - because everyone else has the same abilities as I do. Sometimes it is the same phone. Sometimes it is a better phone.

Many times I take a photo because the view is so beautiful I can't help myself. And the photo I take just never does the view justice. I can't tell you the number of times I have posted a photo and typed those words or shared a photo with a friend and sent those words. The photo is great in itself, but sometimes what is going on in real life is more beautiful than I can get the photo to express.

But, what happens every so often is that I hold my phone up to take what I think is a nice photo but what comes through the screen is much better than I even thought.

Outside Fellowship Hall at PUMC 12/4/2022

This photo is one of those rare ones. The sun was starting to peek out over the hill there and was shining in the window of our Fellowship Hall at church. It was 7:59am, and I had just a minute to grab it. I picked up my phone, opened the camera, and pointed. And what I saw through the camera lens was so much better than what I saw through the window. You can tell there is a bit of glaring from the window, and you can see one of the lights in the Fellowship Hall in the photo at the top. But the photo itself was more than I was expecting and I am so glad that I took the few seconds to take the photo before our Contemplative Service started.

I still don't know what to do with the compliments I receive from the photos I post and share. I just post and share them because I've taken them and I just want to share them because I like them and I feel like others should see them. I just like to share photos because they are a part of me.