Thursday Thoughts - Thank You 2021!

I wanted to see what I had done last year on my last blog entry of 2020, and it was a summary of many blessings I experienced over the course of a very tough year.  And on this last blog entry of 2021, it may be appropriate to do that again.  But instead I wanted to approach it as a "Thank You" for some of the things I experienced over the course of the year.

2021's Word

My word for 2021 was Hope.  And though some days finding hope was hard, it was a persistent theme up until the very last days of December.  And if it wasn't the thing I needed, it was what others needed.  Thank you 2021 for always finding ways to show me hope.

One of Many Sunsets

Thank you God for 2021 and many, many beautiful skies.  And thank you for helping me find my new favorite place to not just view a sunset or clouds but to walk and get some exercise in.  I may have become quite obsessive with my sunset photos and my friend the lone duck, but being by the water for this time really helped center me and refocus me.  And I am so thankful for the many weekend days I had to be able to experience this.

The Wanamaker!!

Thank you 2021 for helping me to get to know my friends better.  I stayed in contact with my friends from high school, every so often by Zoom but mostly by Facebook and group text messages.  I got to know new friends better and take fun trips to take things off my bucket list, like seeing the Wanamaker Organ.  And there was always time for tacos with my bestie!

Sharing about leading

Thank you 2021 for my growth as a leader and a presence at PUMC.  I was able to sing in choir and for gathering music.  I was able to preach a few times.  I would address the congregation on 5th Sundays and share what had been going on in Church Council.  And I put together and guided Laity Sunday's service.

Here's looking to 2022!

I know there are probably some things I have missed.  2021 was an interesting year.  And, except for a week's period when I just didn't know what to say because of stuff going on at home, I blogged twice a week for a full year.  I can't believe it!  There was just so much to go through.  

I look forward to growth in all the areas I touched on as 2022 approaches.  But I am thankful that 2021 was the way it was.  Not every day was great.  There were some really rough days and I expect the same for 2022.  But I hope I can focus on the good things to help me get through the bad ones.  And find the joy in every day.

Thank you God for 2021 and what you put in my life!

Merging is an Ongoing Journey - Christmas Eve 2021

Christmas Eve 2021 was supposed to be a complete 180 from Christmas 2020.  Indoor, in-person services with lots of carol singing, celebrating with families and friends and friends who are like family, lots of excitement, and joy.

Or at least I'm sure that's what a lot of people thought.

But Christmas Eve 2021 turned into one of those Instagram vs. Reality posts.  What I typed up there was the Instagram version.  The reality was, yes in-person services but people still had to be socially distanced.  There was carol singing, but by a very few people who were all spaced 12 feet apart from each other and from the congregation.  There were adjustments to allow the congregation to read some of the carols so it wasn't just like a bunch of people singing and no other participation.  There was a movement to outside so there was adequate space for everyone to stand 12 feet apart so at least one carol, Silent Night, could be sung by all.

But still, what was in both the Instagram and Reality versions was this simple fact - we celebrated Christ's birth with joy after all the anticipation during Advent.

On my way to the 1st of 3 Christmas Eve Services (2021)

There were a lot of hard decisions that had to be made within just a couple days before Christmas Eve.  Of course, the bulk of it lay on our pastor.  But the leadership jumped right in with ways to help our pastor put in motion the updated vision for the services as well as helping with things in between.

But all of that didn't take away from the celebration.  Nothing took away from the story and the familiar scriptures read.  Nothing took away from probably the best prelude at the 10pm service that has brought such peace to me.  And though not everyone could sing the carols, it didn't take away from their meaning.  One song I was looking forward to singing during Lessons and Carols was "Let There Be Peace on Earth."  But instead, this was spoken.  However, I found greater meaning to the song being able to speak the words as opposed to singing it.  I wonder if others too were able to find a different appreciation for songs as they looked at lyrics instead of singing the words.

Christmas Eve was a very long day for me.  But I continued to find the joy in each service.  (The YouTube videos are proof because I really can't stop moving with music!)  Even when my feet were really hurting by the end of the last service (someone aka me thought it a good idea to wear heels for the last 2 Christmas Eve services, because ...???) I almost ran with joy to the front of the church seeing the candles were all still lit on the altar so I could grab a few photos before the candles were all extinguished.

It is a few days later and I am still trying to find ways to keep up the celebration of Christ's birth.  I'm not always successful, that's for sure!  But I am doing the best that I can.

People like to joke about the Instagram vs. Reality posts.  But, you know, this year, I'm not sure I would want to trade the Reality of Christmas Eve 2021 for anything.  With all that has been going on in the world, it was the best way to celebrate and I am glad that we did!

Thursday Thoughts - Word for 2022

I have been giving a lot of thought towards my potential "Word for 2022."  My word for 2021 was "Hope."  I'm not sure the entire year I lived into that word.  I did try to look at things with a hopeful outlook.  Sometimes I failed.  But sometimes I was able to find the hope.  I found the hope for myself.  And I found hope for others, which helped me find my own hope.

There are still things I am hoping for, especially in 2022...because I doubt they will be coming to pass in 2021....not that many days left and some things I hope for I'd need a miracle to get by the end of the year!

So that got me thinking, maybe I should repeat my word, Hope.

But, then some things happened and I feel like God wants me to live out Hope for the rest of 2021, maybe not so much for myself but helping others have HOPE.

But, I think I will need a new word for 2022.

Me - 12/20/2021

I'm leaning towards JOY as my word for 2022.

Granted, I may not always have joy, because some days are harder than others.  Especially now.  But I feel like I can always find joy once again...through church, through music, through nature, through friends/family, through organ music, through sunsets, through singing, through seeing what God puts in my path, through people God puts in my life....

So, I think JOY will be the 2022 word.  I will try to look every day for the JOY and go from there.

Merging is an Ongoing Journey - Coming Home

I've often talked about the feeling of home and being where I belong at church, which, even almost 2 years later still feels a bit new from time to time.

But, after being away for two Thursday rehearsals and a Sunday service, I was ready to be back among everyone.  My first opportunity was Saturday for a special Comfort and Joy service.

Altar before all the candles were put out

This service has been called in the past and in other places "Blue Christmas" - a service to help others who are struggling to find hope and joy during the season.  I was asked to be part of the prayer team who would be available...but in reality it was a service that helped me find the hope and joy that I discovered I had missed because of everything that had gone on in my life personally.

Anyway, I was very apprehensive about returning.  But as soon as I walked into the room where everyone was, the first words I heard were "Welcome Home!"

And boy did I feel like I was home!

This particular service was a nice way to get back into the swing of things.  Especially with Christmas and being part of multiple services coming up very quickly.

And when I came back on Sunday, I still felt like I was coming home and seeing people who, truthfully, I had only not seen for about 10 days or so...but it felt like much longer!

So I returned home...to the familiarity....and it felt great!

Sorry for the short entry this week.  I'm also readjusting to returning to regular life outside of my house and some things are still very crazy.  But it will all work out!

Thursday Thoughts - Being Grateful in Tough Situations

So, this is something I haven't really talked about at all.  But knowing and realizing just how loved and cared for I am along with my family, I thought I'd talk about it.

I have been stuck home after testing positive for Covid.

I have felt fine the entire time, and hopefully by the end of Friday I will have completed my quarantine period and I can leave my house.

After receiving the results, it threw me into a great depression.  I was so sad for a number of reasons.  And I felt like I should shut out the world because I figured I was this person who no one would want to be around because I had tested positive.  I wrote to a couple people saying I was feeling almost like a leper because who would want to be around someone who tested positive?  Or who was in quarantine, even though I would have been officially released?

But then emails and text messages came in from people who wanted to make sure I was okay.  And I realized, just because I couldn't leave my house it didn't mean I needed to shut down.

Morning Sky 12/15/2021

And I certainly shouldn't let it stop me from taking photos!

But I also realized that there were so many things I was grateful for during this tough situation:

- That I had so many friends (who are more like family) who cared to check in on me!  Whether it was once and awhile or every day, it all meant and continues to mean so much to me!

- Also that technology has advanced so much that I could still go to church via a live feed.  And that we could order food and have it delivered through the numerous types of apps out there.  And things that let us order supplies from stores and have those delivered too.  I know so many people offered to bring stuff or pick stuff up for us.  But having this technology available was a good thing too.

- That I had a friend who text me every day to make sure I was okay.  Unless I text her first!

- And a friend who sent me funny videos every day by email so I would laugh until I was released.

- And a friend that checked in via email and I would also email and text sometimes too.

- That people continued to pray for us all as we healed and then returned to regular life.  (I'm almost there!)

- That someone recognized something was up when I didn't update my blog as I usually did.

- That when I would talk about returning to things, people expressed genuine excitement over it and not what I was fearing, that no one would want us back for awhile even if we were cleared.

- For the sunshine and beautiful daytime and nighttime skies that I experienced from my back door when I would let Sparkle out.  It's been awhile since I saw a proper sunset but the views from the back door have been nice.  

- That no one got too severely sick and everyone seems to have recovered well.

- That I was still able to do all I do.  And able to readjust my sleeping schedule so I'm sleeping better now, which overall is a great thing.

There is probably more - but that is what I have for now.

I am so grateful for everyone during this past couple weeks of crazy.  I am so blessed to have all of you in my life!

Merging is an Ongoing Journey - FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)

So, I had to stay home from church this week.  There are a lot of reasons why and I am not going to go into them.  Suffice it to say, the past week and a half has been a little on the crazy side.

For someone who has been so involved in being part of worship, it was very hard, almost upsetting, because I could not be there.  Sure, you may say sometimes you need to rest.  But there are other people who do other things and work way harder than I do who don't get a break, so why should I?

Anyway, I had a break away.  And parts were hard.  Really hard.

But I am really glad that we continue to use the technology employed (and improved upon) that was used so heavily during the pandemic when no one was able to come to church to be physically present in worship.

Sparkle and I during church 12/12/2021

By the way, yes, I was singing along!

But I still had a sense of missing out, a fear of missing out on something that you get when you are in person but not necessarily watching online.  The feel of the music, the atmosphere, the people who are there...

I know I couldn't help it.  And I was where I needed to be.  And I am beyond thankful that I was able to not completely miss out and attend service virtually.

But I can't wait until next week when I can be back!