Monday Musing - The Service that was Hard

Yesterday I did something that I have done many times before, I led a worship service at church. But this one was harder than others.

My wireless mic of choice - a Wappingers Memory

I struggled a lot with coming up with a focus for the sermon, even though I had so much material to read and draw from. If you were there in person or watch the video back, I freely admitted this. I thought that maybe in all the reading I was just hit with a bit of writers block, which can happen to anyone.

But there was something else at the source of all this.

Turns out I was having another "I miss my Mom" moments.

My mom has heard or seen almost all of the services I have led - whether she was there in person or watched it live online or watched it later via YouTube. And the last couple years, even if she didn't see it or hear it or feel like watching it, she always knew when I was leading a service and would always ask me as soon as I came home and she was awake, "How did it go?"

I knew Mom wasn't going to be home on the couch waiting to ask me "How did it go?" And I guess in the back of my mind I was trying to avoid the inevitable. That I wasn't going to hear that and be able to answer that.

Yesterday was a hard one. Especially because it was also a year ago that I drove Mom home from her last vacation to Cape Cod. But hopefully that means the next one, whenever it is, will be a little easier.